Experiences throughout my life
Posted: Fri Feb 05, 2016 7:27 am
Firstly I am really reluctant to speak about this, which is in fact the first time I have told anyone my thoughts and experiences. Nobody knows this not even my wife.
From an early age, in fact as far back as my memory serves me I have had a keen interest in the universe, origins of life and of course other life.
My first recollection of seeing the typical alien image was on a book in a store when I was about 11 years old and it frightened the life out of me (yet i still brought it), I can't even compare this fear to anything else I have ever experienced, chilled to the bone, horrific and still to this day (20 years later) I still cannot comfortably look at pictures of aliens but despite this I have maintained a keen interest in the subject and not been put off.
So now I just want to tell you a few things I have experienced, felt and seen over the years. I will try and put them in some sort of chronological order best I can.
---
The earliest vivid untoward memory I have is really very vague and in fact one of my earliest memories, I estimate my age 3-4 years old. I was under my duvet, particularly frightened of something and a feeling of being trapped.
During my early years I have been told I had an imaginary friend. One day whilst driving with my parents in an unfamiliar area I pointed and told my parents that that's where the friend lived. This was in the middle of nowhere and it certainly creeped out my parents at the time. I have no memory of this myself so is a complete second hand recollection.
As a child I was always afraid of the dark and being alone. I would often purposely wake up my brother with whom i shared a room so I did not feel alone at night. I was always aware of humming noises and often heard them ringing in my ear during the night.
Aged 10ish I remember playing games on a field outside of a clubhouse and spotted a diamond shaped object visible in the sky just drifting. It was not lit and almost as dark as the sky, barely visible. I pointed it out to others that did not seem to notice or care. I associate this memory with the same humming noises but I can't recall if that was the case.
Not long after I think was when I began to develop a more keen interest/phobia upon viewing and purchasing a book about aliens.
My early teenage memories are filled with troubled and fearful sleep as well as feelings of being watched, particularly a fear of dark windows.
Later teenage years I experienced a lot of sleep paralysis and the same fear of sleeping alone at night. It comforted me to leave lights on, a radio playing in the background or a tv on. For quite some time I would wake up and look at my bedside clock to read 3:16am, it was uncanny. I invented my own little prayer that i used to recite in my head before bed along the lines of 'if there is anything happening, please don't let me remember, I don't want to know'.
Approx 13 years old I remember driving with parents in the car and seeing an enormous fireball descending over a busy town we were about to travel through. I seemed to be the only person concerned or even notice this happening which I thought particularly odd. I expected something in the news the following day, but nothing, again odd.
A couple of unusual events worth mentioning during my later teenage years:
One night I woke up with a mouth full of blood, no sign of nosebleed or cuts in my mouth. It was certainly strange and alarming at the time.
The second was when I was woken up in the night to a loud electrical sound like something in my room short circuiting, seconds later we had a minor earthquake in the area. As this is my only experience of an earthquake I have no idea if such sounds are of the norm or not.
my 20's were mostly uneventful but the uneasy sleeping and fear of the dark/being alone remained. I got married and brought a house together. More comforting sharing a bed with someone at night I think it helped a lot.
Now in my early 30's. I can recall over the last few years having multiple dreams about ufo's chasing me down. I will notice them in the sky, initially amazed and exciting at what I am seeing which quickly turns to complete terror as I realize I have been spotted and it's coming towards me. Really vivid and frightening. I have recently been suffering with sleep and fear of dark and quiet nights.
Much to the annoyance of my wife I leave TV running on silently in the room for light and listen to my ipod quietly, ensuring I am tightly tucked in and not looking out into the empty space of our room or with a pillow over my head. She thinks I am just a bad sleeper, I am in fact quite scared.
----
My conclusion is that I have either developed an irrational phobia/fear due to an unhealthy interest in a subject that clearly makes me uncomfortable or that something has/does happen. The latter completely terrifies me and if that were the case I really have no desire to know. I have however read deeply into all the mainstream ufo/abduction cases and theories over the years which suggests I may have created this whole illusion myself.
I would be interested to hear your thoughts
From an early age, in fact as far back as my memory serves me I have had a keen interest in the universe, origins of life and of course other life.
My first recollection of seeing the typical alien image was on a book in a store when I was about 11 years old and it frightened the life out of me (yet i still brought it), I can't even compare this fear to anything else I have ever experienced, chilled to the bone, horrific and still to this day (20 years later) I still cannot comfortably look at pictures of aliens but despite this I have maintained a keen interest in the subject and not been put off.
So now I just want to tell you a few things I have experienced, felt and seen over the years. I will try and put them in some sort of chronological order best I can.
---
The earliest vivid untoward memory I have is really very vague and in fact one of my earliest memories, I estimate my age 3-4 years old. I was under my duvet, particularly frightened of something and a feeling of being trapped.
During my early years I have been told I had an imaginary friend. One day whilst driving with my parents in an unfamiliar area I pointed and told my parents that that's where the friend lived. This was in the middle of nowhere and it certainly creeped out my parents at the time. I have no memory of this myself so is a complete second hand recollection.
As a child I was always afraid of the dark and being alone. I would often purposely wake up my brother with whom i shared a room so I did not feel alone at night. I was always aware of humming noises and often heard them ringing in my ear during the night.
Aged 10ish I remember playing games on a field outside of a clubhouse and spotted a diamond shaped object visible in the sky just drifting. It was not lit and almost as dark as the sky, barely visible. I pointed it out to others that did not seem to notice or care. I associate this memory with the same humming noises but I can't recall if that was the case.
Not long after I think was when I began to develop a more keen interest/phobia upon viewing and purchasing a book about aliens.
My early teenage memories are filled with troubled and fearful sleep as well as feelings of being watched, particularly a fear of dark windows.
Later teenage years I experienced a lot of sleep paralysis and the same fear of sleeping alone at night. It comforted me to leave lights on, a radio playing in the background or a tv on. For quite some time I would wake up and look at my bedside clock to read 3:16am, it was uncanny. I invented my own little prayer that i used to recite in my head before bed along the lines of 'if there is anything happening, please don't let me remember, I don't want to know'.
Approx 13 years old I remember driving with parents in the car and seeing an enormous fireball descending over a busy town we were about to travel through. I seemed to be the only person concerned or even notice this happening which I thought particularly odd. I expected something in the news the following day, but nothing, again odd.
A couple of unusual events worth mentioning during my later teenage years:
One night I woke up with a mouth full of blood, no sign of nosebleed or cuts in my mouth. It was certainly strange and alarming at the time.
The second was when I was woken up in the night to a loud electrical sound like something in my room short circuiting, seconds later we had a minor earthquake in the area. As this is my only experience of an earthquake I have no idea if such sounds are of the norm or not.
my 20's were mostly uneventful but the uneasy sleeping and fear of the dark/being alone remained. I got married and brought a house together. More comforting sharing a bed with someone at night I think it helped a lot.
Now in my early 30's. I can recall over the last few years having multiple dreams about ufo's chasing me down. I will notice them in the sky, initially amazed and exciting at what I am seeing which quickly turns to complete terror as I realize I have been spotted and it's coming towards me. Really vivid and frightening. I have recently been suffering with sleep and fear of dark and quiet nights.
Much to the annoyance of my wife I leave TV running on silently in the room for light and listen to my ipod quietly, ensuring I am tightly tucked in and not looking out into the empty space of our room or with a pillow over my head. She thinks I am just a bad sleeper, I am in fact quite scared.
----
My conclusion is that I have either developed an irrational phobia/fear due to an unhealthy interest in a subject that clearly makes me uncomfortable or that something has/does happen. The latter completely terrifies me and if that were the case I really have no desire to know. I have however read deeply into all the mainstream ufo/abduction cases and theories over the years which suggests I may have created this whole illusion myself.
I would be interested to hear your thoughts