Always been a very big skeptic but...
Posted: Fri Apr 30, 2010 10:53 am
By all admission, I've always been sort of open minded. At least, in the sense that I do believe there are extraterrestrial beings, somewhere out there...that there is life on other planets, that there are civilizations far beyond our understanding and capabilities. However, I've always been a big skeptic when it comes to alien abduction, despite certain vague memories in my lifetime that should have been reason enough to possibly believe.
That being said, I suppose I should start explaining what has been going on, however hard it may be for me to actually put these things down on paper. Lately, I have just been.. different. I find myself doing things that I don't normally do, without any good reasons behind them. For example, I'll be laying down in my bed and really, out of nowhere get this urge to just.. walk to the window and look up at the sky. I've spent many nights recently avoiding my bed, choosing to sleep on a recliner in the living room instead. Beyond those two habitual abnormalities for me, one thing did provoke me recently to choose to accept that certain things are going on, and even cause me to sit here and begin to write this in hopes of some words of advice or even support. I woke up the other night after I had fallen asleep on my couch, facing the backrests on my couch, to a bright light. (Not sure if this whole encounter was a dream but it certainly didn't feel like it) I opened my eyes, and i felt a piercing drilling, buzzing sound inside my left ear (which was facing up). I tried SO hard to move, yell, to turn around, but even though I was trying with ALL my strength, all i was able to do was move my left leg (again, facing up) very slightly. It felt like there was someone in the room with me, but despite how hard I tried I could not move, and it got to the point where I felt so defeated. I just gave up. I didnt know what was going on, I was laying there with my heart beating a million beats a second, and couldnt do anything about it. Next thing I knew, it was 7 am, and i woke up from my sleep. Again, maybe this was all a dream but it just didn't feel like it, in my mind I think that I know that it wasnt a dream. Now, I cant even sleep any more. Every time I close my eyes, I have certain images in my head that in all honesty terrify me. Looking back into my childhood I've always had dreams, very vivid ones, but I always attributed those dreams to just being a kid with an imagination running wild, who has watched too many scary movies. I guess at this point, I'll leave it open to any words that any of you can share. Thanks for taking the time to read.
That being said, I suppose I should start explaining what has been going on, however hard it may be for me to actually put these things down on paper. Lately, I have just been.. different. I find myself doing things that I don't normally do, without any good reasons behind them. For example, I'll be laying down in my bed and really, out of nowhere get this urge to just.. walk to the window and look up at the sky. I've spent many nights recently avoiding my bed, choosing to sleep on a recliner in the living room instead. Beyond those two habitual abnormalities for me, one thing did provoke me recently to choose to accept that certain things are going on, and even cause me to sit here and begin to write this in hopes of some words of advice or even support. I woke up the other night after I had fallen asleep on my couch, facing the backrests on my couch, to a bright light. (Not sure if this whole encounter was a dream but it certainly didn't feel like it) I opened my eyes, and i felt a piercing drilling, buzzing sound inside my left ear (which was facing up). I tried SO hard to move, yell, to turn around, but even though I was trying with ALL my strength, all i was able to do was move my left leg (again, facing up) very slightly. It felt like there was someone in the room with me, but despite how hard I tried I could not move, and it got to the point where I felt so defeated. I just gave up. I didnt know what was going on, I was laying there with my heart beating a million beats a second, and couldnt do anything about it. Next thing I knew, it was 7 am, and i woke up from my sleep. Again, maybe this was all a dream but it just didn't feel like it, in my mind I think that I know that it wasnt a dream. Now, I cant even sleep any more. Every time I close my eyes, I have certain images in my head that in all honesty terrify me. Looking back into my childhood I've always had dreams, very vivid ones, but I always attributed those dreams to just being a kid with an imagination running wild, who has watched too many scary movies. I guess at this point, I'll leave it open to any words that any of you can share. Thanks for taking the time to read.