New Here...Starting with my wake-up experience
Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 1:47 am
Hello out there. New to this forum. Really just searching for a place to share and discuss these experiences anonymously with sympathetic characters. Don't really have any flesh and blood folk I can share this stuff with, so TAG! you're it! WARNING: I like to write so posts can be on the long side. Sorry.
I guess I'll start with the experience that really woke me up to what was really going on. I had always had strange experiences, but, truthfully, I just shoved them to the back of my mind because they made no sense. At most, I thought they might just be neat spiritual experiences. But something happened a few years ago that made me re-view and re-evaluate everything I had ever experienced up to the present.
To begin I'd just like to emphasize I was raised in the country by country folk who love Jesus and don't have room for much else. I really wasn't raised around "UFO stuff". Stuff of that nature was considered demonic and was not suitable for discussion. I remember when the book Communion came out. I was in elementary school. I remember looking at the cover of the book at the store and wondering about it. My mom caught me looking at it and said it was a picture of a demon, so I put it out of my mind. Truthfully, UFOs and aliens really never entered my mind at all until January of 2008 when, out of the blue, I saw my first UFO. I would see many over the next two years. To me they were just curious lights in the sky. I didn't even think about what could be flying them. I wouldn't allow myself. Since I didn't have any evidence beyond a flashing light, I would not let myself speculate any further about them. I prided myself on my objectivity. Then, as they say, all hell broke loose....
It was the beginning of 2009, most likely the month of January (most of these events happen in the early part of the year). It was the most unusual, out-of-context night of my life. It seemed to come completely out of left-field. I woke up, lying on my back. I want to emphasize that I was fully awake when this was happening. I turned my head to my left and to my surprise saw a very short typical grey alien...except his skin looked more blue/gray, iridescent-like, with tinges of green which could have been its skin reflecting the green from my wallpaper and the eyes were much bigger and blacker, and extended roundly from the head a little, and there was a distinct ridge, like a brow ridge above the eyes. I'm telling you, I could describe every last detail of this creature; I saw him so clearly. I slept with the lamp on so there was plenty of soft light to see him by. I'll never forget what I saw. He wasn't much taller than the bed, maybe 4 feet tall. His body was very thin. His left hand was resting on the bed by my hip. I noticed the elbow joint looked like an outer-joint, like a grasshopper leg joint, instead of an inner-joint of bone inside flesh. I can't stress enough that at the moment I felt I was fully awake and that this was really happening. I wasn't scared at first. I felt strangely serene. In fact, I was a little excited. I couldn't believe something so out-of-the-ordinary was happening. It was like a miracle, and I wanted to relish it. I spoke to the creature in my mind. Looking back, I wonder why I did this. How did I know to "think" at it instead of speaking with my mouth? In my mind I said to the creature, "Well, aren't you interesting!" After I thought this, it walked up the length of the bed until it's face was next to my face. I could feel it "say" very clearly inside my mind, "Don't be afraid." Then it cocked its head ever so slightly so that I could see full into its left eye. Then everything changed. I don't know how to explain it. The eye was black and slightly translucent as if it was made of cloudy black jello. After it cocked it's head, the quality of the eye changed. I don't know how else to explain it. I was looking into its eye and the quality of the eye changed. Nothing visually changed inside the eye. So hard to explain. But suddenly it was like I was being sucked into the eye and the eye, this being, was suddenly inside me, inside my mind. It was such an unexpected shock! In a flash, I turned from being peaceful and curious to absolute fear. And it was like a fear that I had never felt before. I wish I could explain it. It was like it was inside me and was taking me over, like it was invading my mind. I felt my whole self involuntarily open up to it. I had never felt anything like this before, not that I could remember. It was opening me up like a telescope, and it happened so fast, I immediately responded with fear. And the fear was like madness, like paralyzing, maddening fear.
At this point, I became completely paralyzed. I couldn't move a muscle; I was stiff as a board. Then I started to vibrate all over. Then I started levitating right off the bed! The covers were still on top of me, but as I began to float up in the room the sheets vibrated, too. This was a few years before the movie, The Fourth Kind came out, and it was exactly like that scene where the man floats up in bed and the sheets are rippling beneath him. This whole time the alien was staring into my eyes, and I could not tear my eyes away from him. He backed up as I started to float up and towards him and toward the bedroom windows. I couldn't look away from him at this point, but I could tell the lights in the room were going crazy. I felt like I was being zapped by electricity, the vibrating was electrical and also like a low hum. At this point, I began to scream-pray in my head. Then I completely blacked out.
The next thing I knew I woke up in my bed flat on my back, arms to my sides, with the covers over me, smoothed perfectly and pulled up to my chin. Because I had this sensation of "waking up" I blew the whole thing off as a creepy dream after it had happened; it was just a nightmare. A few months later I told a friend (with whom I had seen a UFO) and he said that sounded like a textbook abduction. I ordered a few of the standard abduction books, like from Mack and Jacobs. I read in one of Jacobs books about something in common with most abduction cases and that is something he calls the "mindscan," where one of the aliens looks into the eyes of the abductee, like a few inches from their face, and makes them feel certain emotions or see certain things. I was a little creeped out to say the least. At first I was understandably just terrified of the experience. Then I started to feel a little upset, "Why would it tell me not to be afraid and then immediately make me afraid?" It made no sense, and, honestly, it felt a little cruel. Now I'm realizing that the fear is more like a natural physical reaction to interaction with them. I don't think they want to make me afraid; it's just that contact does that; it's like a side-effect of the technology or the reality-bending nature of the experience. I think this because I can rationally disassociate myself from the fear--there's no real cause or impetus to be afraid (I've never been threatened or harmed); it seems to be purely a reaction to the experience (like sneezing or coughing is a reaction to allergens). I've also noticed the fear can be switched on and off immediately which lets me know it's a reaction to some kind of technology or some part of the experience; it was the first time, to my knowledge, that an alien had entered into communication with my mind; I had never felt anyone else "inside my mind" before, and that understandably freaked me out. I've experienced the fear completely dissolving into immediate bliss or calmness and vice versa with no logical reason for the emotions or their changes. Again, it's like they or the tech or the fact of being open to them directly excite the emotional centers of the brain, either purposefully or incidentally as the brain reacts to the fluctuations in the electromagnetism of the experience (the electric feel seems to be elemental to the experience--vibration, humming, static electricity feeling to the skin, sense of confusion).
The experiences I've had since then have all seemed to be working towards me overcoming my fears so I can ease into the experience and observe. I know when I react in shock and fear, I shut down and forget a lot. I'm hoping if I'm able to remain as calm as possible, I can remember more. I want to remember. I feel like I'm supposed to remember, like it's time to remember. I want to communicate. I don't want to wig out on them every time they show up. I want to be cognizant and responsive. I want to learn and retain.
I guess I'll start with the experience that really woke me up to what was really going on. I had always had strange experiences, but, truthfully, I just shoved them to the back of my mind because they made no sense. At most, I thought they might just be neat spiritual experiences. But something happened a few years ago that made me re-view and re-evaluate everything I had ever experienced up to the present.
To begin I'd just like to emphasize I was raised in the country by country folk who love Jesus and don't have room for much else. I really wasn't raised around "UFO stuff". Stuff of that nature was considered demonic and was not suitable for discussion. I remember when the book Communion came out. I was in elementary school. I remember looking at the cover of the book at the store and wondering about it. My mom caught me looking at it and said it was a picture of a demon, so I put it out of my mind. Truthfully, UFOs and aliens really never entered my mind at all until January of 2008 when, out of the blue, I saw my first UFO. I would see many over the next two years. To me they were just curious lights in the sky. I didn't even think about what could be flying them. I wouldn't allow myself. Since I didn't have any evidence beyond a flashing light, I would not let myself speculate any further about them. I prided myself on my objectivity. Then, as they say, all hell broke loose....
It was the beginning of 2009, most likely the month of January (most of these events happen in the early part of the year). It was the most unusual, out-of-context night of my life. It seemed to come completely out of left-field. I woke up, lying on my back. I want to emphasize that I was fully awake when this was happening. I turned my head to my left and to my surprise saw a very short typical grey alien...except his skin looked more blue/gray, iridescent-like, with tinges of green which could have been its skin reflecting the green from my wallpaper and the eyes were much bigger and blacker, and extended roundly from the head a little, and there was a distinct ridge, like a brow ridge above the eyes. I'm telling you, I could describe every last detail of this creature; I saw him so clearly. I slept with the lamp on so there was plenty of soft light to see him by. I'll never forget what I saw. He wasn't much taller than the bed, maybe 4 feet tall. His body was very thin. His left hand was resting on the bed by my hip. I noticed the elbow joint looked like an outer-joint, like a grasshopper leg joint, instead of an inner-joint of bone inside flesh. I can't stress enough that at the moment I felt I was fully awake and that this was really happening. I wasn't scared at first. I felt strangely serene. In fact, I was a little excited. I couldn't believe something so out-of-the-ordinary was happening. It was like a miracle, and I wanted to relish it. I spoke to the creature in my mind. Looking back, I wonder why I did this. How did I know to "think" at it instead of speaking with my mouth? In my mind I said to the creature, "Well, aren't you interesting!" After I thought this, it walked up the length of the bed until it's face was next to my face. I could feel it "say" very clearly inside my mind, "Don't be afraid." Then it cocked its head ever so slightly so that I could see full into its left eye. Then everything changed. I don't know how to explain it. The eye was black and slightly translucent as if it was made of cloudy black jello. After it cocked it's head, the quality of the eye changed. I don't know how else to explain it. I was looking into its eye and the quality of the eye changed. Nothing visually changed inside the eye. So hard to explain. But suddenly it was like I was being sucked into the eye and the eye, this being, was suddenly inside me, inside my mind. It was such an unexpected shock! In a flash, I turned from being peaceful and curious to absolute fear. And it was like a fear that I had never felt before. I wish I could explain it. It was like it was inside me and was taking me over, like it was invading my mind. I felt my whole self involuntarily open up to it. I had never felt anything like this before, not that I could remember. It was opening me up like a telescope, and it happened so fast, I immediately responded with fear. And the fear was like madness, like paralyzing, maddening fear.
At this point, I became completely paralyzed. I couldn't move a muscle; I was stiff as a board. Then I started to vibrate all over. Then I started levitating right off the bed! The covers were still on top of me, but as I began to float up in the room the sheets vibrated, too. This was a few years before the movie, The Fourth Kind came out, and it was exactly like that scene where the man floats up in bed and the sheets are rippling beneath him. This whole time the alien was staring into my eyes, and I could not tear my eyes away from him. He backed up as I started to float up and towards him and toward the bedroom windows. I couldn't look away from him at this point, but I could tell the lights in the room were going crazy. I felt like I was being zapped by electricity, the vibrating was electrical and also like a low hum. At this point, I began to scream-pray in my head. Then I completely blacked out.
The next thing I knew I woke up in my bed flat on my back, arms to my sides, with the covers over me, smoothed perfectly and pulled up to my chin. Because I had this sensation of "waking up" I blew the whole thing off as a creepy dream after it had happened; it was just a nightmare. A few months later I told a friend (with whom I had seen a UFO) and he said that sounded like a textbook abduction. I ordered a few of the standard abduction books, like from Mack and Jacobs. I read in one of Jacobs books about something in common with most abduction cases and that is something he calls the "mindscan," where one of the aliens looks into the eyes of the abductee, like a few inches from their face, and makes them feel certain emotions or see certain things. I was a little creeped out to say the least. At first I was understandably just terrified of the experience. Then I started to feel a little upset, "Why would it tell me not to be afraid and then immediately make me afraid?" It made no sense, and, honestly, it felt a little cruel. Now I'm realizing that the fear is more like a natural physical reaction to interaction with them. I don't think they want to make me afraid; it's just that contact does that; it's like a side-effect of the technology or the reality-bending nature of the experience. I think this because I can rationally disassociate myself from the fear--there's no real cause or impetus to be afraid (I've never been threatened or harmed); it seems to be purely a reaction to the experience (like sneezing or coughing is a reaction to allergens). I've also noticed the fear can be switched on and off immediately which lets me know it's a reaction to some kind of technology or some part of the experience; it was the first time, to my knowledge, that an alien had entered into communication with my mind; I had never felt anyone else "inside my mind" before, and that understandably freaked me out. I've experienced the fear completely dissolving into immediate bliss or calmness and vice versa with no logical reason for the emotions or their changes. Again, it's like they or the tech or the fact of being open to them directly excite the emotional centers of the brain, either purposefully or incidentally as the brain reacts to the fluctuations in the electromagnetism of the experience (the electric feel seems to be elemental to the experience--vibration, humming, static electricity feeling to the skin, sense of confusion).
The experiences I've had since then have all seemed to be working towards me overcoming my fears so I can ease into the experience and observe. I know when I react in shock and fear, I shut down and forget a lot. I'm hoping if I'm able to remain as calm as possible, I can remember more. I want to remember. I feel like I'm supposed to remember, like it's time to remember. I want to communicate. I don't want to wig out on them every time they show up. I want to be cognizant and responsive. I want to learn and retain.